Warren...Don't Call Me Jimmy... Buffett

Warren Buffett is not your average investor. One of the most brilliant financial minds in the history of capitalism, Mr. Buffett has earned a personal fortune that regularly places him among Forbes magazine's wealthiest individuals. And yet, unlike so many of his fellow billionaires, Buffett isn't afraid to make fun of himself.

In a newly released promotional video for Geico Insurance, Mr. Buffett makes a surprise cameo appearance as an '80s style rocker with more than a passing resemblance to Axl Rose. The two-minute song, currently blowing up in the blogosphere, features real Geico employees singing a deliberately cheesy power ballad on customer service and the greatness of their company. Things get really interesting toward the end when, after a few quick and mysterious glimpses, Warren "The Shredder" Buffett takes to the stage in full glory.

Want to see the world's third richest person channel his inner rock god? Watch below...

OFF Star

(DALLAS) A man fired from a Texas auto dealership used an Internet service to remotely disable ignitions and set off car horns of more than 100 vehicles sold at his old workplace, police said Wednesday. Austin police arrested Omar Ramos-Lopez, 20, on Wednesday, charging him with felony breach of computer security. Ramos-Lopez used a former colleague's password to deactivate starters and set off car horns, police said. Several car owners said they had to call tow trucks and were left stranded at work or home.

"He caused these customers, now victims, to miss work," Austin police spokeswoman Veneza Aguinaga said. "They didn't get paid. They had to get tow trucks. They didn't know what was going on with their vehicles."

Dil - DON'T!

Tiger Woods' lawyer is trying to do something Tiger wasn't even able to do himself -- keep the golfer's private parts out of random people's hands.

TMZ has obtained a letter Tiger's lawyer sent to Pipedream Products -- the company that is selling a line of Tiger sex toys ... including blow-up Tiger sex dolls, giant condoms and a number of filthy items we won't even try to describe.
In the letter, Tiger's lawyer demands Pipedream stop selling the porno products, recall all items that have already been distributed and then destroy or dispose them "in a manner and at a time as directed by Tiger Woods."
The photos above are from a XXX store in L.A. where the dirty goods are already being sold.
A rep for Pipedream had no comment.

Read more: http://www.tmz.com/#ixzz0idVhobU5

Bleeding Green and Gold

Like many teams in the NFL, the Green Bay Packers have their own Hall of Fame. One of the things that makes the Packers Hall of Fame special is the fact that they actually induct fans. This year, they inducted only their 12th fan, Jim Becker of Racine, Wisconsin.

Jim, a long-time season-ticket holder who has attended games every year from 1952 through 2008, saw his first game in 1941 when he was only 11 years old.

When times were tight, Jim had trouble paying for his season tickets, so he sold his blood for 15 dollars a pint. And, incredibly, selling his blood saved his life. During a recent routine physical, he learned he had a deadly condition called hemochromatosis. The only treatment for this condition is to remove excess iron in the blood ... by donating it.

By the time he learned of his condition, Jim had sold 145 pints of blood to pay for his season tickets. If he hadn't, he would have died. His love of the Packers saved his life.

One Shining D-Bag

We started with 65 douchebags. And now we're down to the final two. We've had upsets, blowouts and even some vote tampering by hackers (would you expect anything less from a douchebag tourney?) but here we are. After analyzing the results and discounting the fake votes, we have our final, championship match-up: Octo-Mom vs Rush Limbaugh.

Click here to see the complete bracket.

You know what to do. Vote on the bigger douchebag and we will announce the champion tomorrow at about 1pm EST (along with a very special "One Shining Moment" video retrospective of the tournament.) Let the final game begin.

Vote HERE

LIVE from the Comedy Quarter....

James Sibley makes his return to the Comedy Quarter in Neenah.

A Rose By Any Other Name

Good to see Axl Rose hasn't changed a bit. The Guns N' Roses frontman was so pissed this weekend during a concert he almost walked off stage -- after being pelted with a water bottle. It all went down in Sao Paulo, Brazil, when someone in the audience launched a liquid filled plastic projectile at Rose during the opening number.
Axl was ticked and stopped the show while screaming "You wanna f**k up the show for everybody? You wanna f**k with me and my boys? We will leave."
They didn't -- and the show continued moments later.

Got Your Nose!

Why do people get pinched on St. Patrick's Day if they do not wear green?

It's thought that the pinching started in the early 1700s, about the time that awareness of St. Patrick's as a holiday came to the fore, too, in Boston, in the Massachusetts colony. They thought if you wore green, it made you invisible to the Leprechauns, which was good because they would pinch anyone they could see. So the pinching is to warn and remind you about the Leprechauns.
Pinching those not wearing green on St. Patrick's Day is an American tradition, having really nothing to do with Ireland or St. Patrick Wrong. I have lived in Ireland. The truth is, Irish people think Americans are crazy. St. Patrick's Day is not even remotely celebrated over there as heavily as it is in the US.

WikiAnswers users share their ideas on the origin:

• Many years ago, playful Irish children began the tradition of pinching people who forgot to wear green on St. Patrick's Day and the tradition is still practiced today.
  
• You get pinched because you're a nonconformist.
• Pinching gives you a bruise so you can have some green on you.
• The act of pinching on St. Patrick's day began in America with Irish settlers who tried to get their kids to behave by telling them that fairies/leprechauns would come pinch them.

The Apocalypse Is Upon Us

It finally happened as we all feared.... someone has hired Gilbert Gottfried as the "spokes person" for an infomercial. The product is the Shoedini (like Houdini) and the result is unsurprisingly grating.

Washin' the Dog ...Washin' the Dog....

Japanese inventors, realizing that just about everything has already been invented, have created the first-ever washing machine for dogs and cats. Just open the door, insert your pet, select the appropriate cycle and the let the machine do the rest.

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Lucky Charms and Green Beer

Join the Afternoon Road Show LIVE on the road at Emmett's Pub & Grill - on Richmond Street in Appleton from 2-6. You can partake in Emmett's St. Patrick's Day Menu, Green Bud (I'm talking about beer stoners > B.Y.O.W.) and a chance to win $500 in airfare from Outagamie County Airport and Delta Airlines!!

• Bud Light drink specials
• Great food specials
• Fun St. Patrick's Day games
• Prizes from Bud Light and WAPL
• A Bud Light light-up sign for you to win

WAPL's Irish Fling Sponsored by Bud Light, Outagamie County Airport, Delta Airlines, and
105.7 WAPL.

A Long Time Ago.....

Coming to a Galaxy near you... STAR WARS in CONCERT.
Announced today by PMI Entertainment Group - the multi-media presentation of John Williams' score for all six films will fly into the Resch Center in Green Bay on July 3rd for TWO shows - one for each side of the Force.
Tickets go on sale Saturday, March 27th at 11am at all Oneida Casino TicketStar Outlets.Details here young Jedi
Official Star Wars in concert web site

Against All Odds

Not the Phil Collins love song from the movie of the same name... but instead your odds on the NCAA Tourney this year as computed by DePaul math professor and NCAA tourney buff Jeffery Bergen.

(1) The number of ways to fill out a bracket once the "play in game" is out of the way.
9,223,372,036,854,775,808 (I think that's Gazillion)

(2) If the tournament expands to 96 teams that number also expands to...
39,614,081,257,132,168,796,771,975,168

(3) It would be slightly easier to predict the winner of every game in a 96 team field than it is to win the state lottery four weeks in a row while buying one ticket a week.

(4) The number of ways to pick the teams that will make the final four.
65,536

(5) It is virtually impossible to pick all the first round games correctly.
The number of ways for the first round to turn out. 4,294,967,296

Good Luck!

WORST DRIVER EVER

How do you miss a rock slide in the middle of the road?
I'll wait for your answer. Waiting... and waiting.... still waiting .....
OK trick question - THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL YOU COULD MISS A ROCK SLIDE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD. But this guy did. You can even hear him say "I didn't even see it!"
Even more amazingly... he wasn't drunk or stoned just DUMB.

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Mystery Solved!

One of the biggest mysteries from the International Incident 2010 aside from what else besides a McDonalds and a deer will we hit on the way home was...
WHO owns the HUGE yacht parked on the ocean in front of our resort The Golden Crown Paradise??
Len zoomed in on the name of the ship and it was "The Attessa". The Attessa is NOT owned by Bill Gates as most people on the trip theorized... or by John Travolta... Eddy Murphy... Nic Cage... Mariah Carrey... etc ... but by Montana industrialist Dennis Washington. What does he do? He's a billionaire - that's what he does. For here's a link to more Yacht-erazzi.

aNTI-dENTITE

He has nice teeth but Calgaro's an "Anti-Dentite"at heart.
All will be explained on the Afternoon Road Show

R.I.P. - now in stereo!!

After he dies, Christopher Hill plans to speak to his grandchildren, great grandchildren and even future generations from beyond the grave – not through a psychic medium or his last will and testament, but through a microchip. "I think that when you walk by a gravestone and only see things like a few words, or a name and a date, it can be somewhat cold, impersonal, and almost incomplete," the 41-year-old from Northern Virginia told ABCNews.com. "This gravestone is supposed to tell the story of a person, and provide you that connection or emotional remembrance."

With new technology developed by a Phoenix, Ariz. company, he now thinks that could be a real possibility. Launched by Objecs, LLC last month, Personal RosettaStones are iPod-sized stone tablets embedded with RFID (Radio Frequency Identification) tags that can store up to 1,000 words and a picture. When they're near a mobile phone equipped with compatible technology, the information in the microchip is beamed right on to the cell phone screen. Objecs says the tags, which can be affixed to headstones, can last for up to 3,200 years. - ABC NEWS

You've Got Something On Your Teeth

You may be tempted to celebrate this coming St. Patrick's Day with some green beers, but be careful. The green dye used in that St. Patty's Day pint may turn your teeth green.

A West Virginia-based dentist says he's had many patients come to him after St. Patrick's Day with green choppers.

He says the key to avoiding this problem is to brush your teeth immediately after drinking. Don't fall asleep, or, more accurately, pass out without brushing.

He also advises that drinking through a straw could avoid the problem -- and says it's actually better to chug the beer as opposed to sipping it. That shouldn't be too much of a problem for anyone!

Source: FlashNews.com

Gentlemen (and Ladies) Start Your Brackets!!!!!

Let's Get Ready To Gamble!

As employers around the country brace for the annual loss of office productivity known as the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament - Office copiers are running on full blast to copy brackets so Sally in accounting can take the trophy home - AGAIN!
Damn you Sally.
This year, workers distracted by March Madness could cost employers as much as $1.8 billion in unproductive wages during the first week of the tournament, alone. This $1.8 billion in losses is based on just 20 minutes of daily time wasting. One of the reasons March Madness grinds productivity to a halt is that about half of the 32 games on the first two days of the tournament, Thursday and Friday, are played during business hours.

Source: San Francisco Chronicle